nine-ish

You may have noticed that a few days ago, we hit nine months on the waitlist for a referral.

I wasn't sure whether or not to post about this - since I'm not sure right now what nine months on the waitlist really means... With Simon's adoption, and even until about 2-3 months ago, there was an end point that was reasonably predictable, so it was kind of fun counting down... "knowing" that we were getting closer and closer to expanding our family. Technically, it's still true; every day we wait is one less day until we will learn about the little girl that will join our family. But unlike in the past, we can no longer get comfortable with the idea that X months down = about Y-Z months left. Y and Z in this equation have become complete unknowns.

And so, our defense mechanisms shift into high gear, and we tell ourselves that maybe we won't wrap this adoption up until 2013 (and, for the record, there is no particular basis for this date, other than an attempt to push our expectations far enough out that we can try not to over-analyze every statement, rumor, feeling, question, etc. related to our adoption). Of course, I hope we are able to become a family of four much sooner than that, but whatever happens, we will find our way.

We have intentionally not said much about the news, rumors, questions, etc. surrounding international (and in particular, Ethiopian) adoptions right now, and hope you will understand. I think these issues are way too complicated (and frankly, personal) to ever do them justice on this blog...

What I can say is that for now we are staying the course, hopeful that our adoption will still be viable, whether this year or next (or the year after that). When we began the adoption process for Simon in 2007, we looked to Ethiopia for many reasons. Those reasons all continue to be true. And today we have even more. As a family, we have been touched by Ethiopia and will forever be tied to this country.

And that's all I can say....

On a lighter note, here are a few gratuitous shots of Simon's 3rd birthday party. The party was in February, so I'm a bit late in sharing them... not to mention they really have nothing to do with the rest of this post. But they make me smile, so why not?

sigh

As I alluded to in my last post, and as you may have heard by now, the adoption process in Ethiopia is undergoing changes. I have not posted much about this, since there has not been much detailed information about the changes (and we do not wish to post inaccurate information or to speculate), and, anyway, we really do not know yet how the changes will affect us.

What the US State Department has reported is that the government agency in Ethiopia that reviews all pending intercountry adoption cases has indicated that it will reduce the number of cases it processes on a per day basis. We believe this decision was made in order to enable that agency to focus on improvements to the adoption process and the overall welfare of children in Ethiopia, and so we will trust that things will happen the way they are supposed to.

Of course, that isn't much to go on, and I won't pretend that it is easy to wait to see how things do play out. Especially since we might be waiting a loooooooooong time. But that is the way international adoption goes.

So just a quick update for everyone. I know there a lot of opinions out there about a lot of things related to international adoption, and I imagine that some of you would like to hear more about our opinions, but I hope you will respect our decision to keep those private and not to engage in the "political" (for lack of a better word) side of things. International adoption is a deeply complicated subject, one with many questions and challenges and not always as many clear answers, one that evokes many emotions and passions, and one which is an integral and very personal part of our lives.